Announcements:

Want to blog for DK? Let us know if you’re interested in writing the recaps for your venue! Sign up here! 

Mondays @ RiRa | Mondays @ Penn Social | Tuesdays @ Policy

Wednesdays @ Policy | Thursdays @ The Getaway

Mondays @ RiRa

Last Week’s Recap: Jeff M. (Mr. Holland’s O-Face)

This Week (May 20, Week Two):

• Theme: Disney/Broadway
• Rainbow Connection Song: TBD
• Who’s Up First: MICnificant
  
• Invite your Friends: Mondays @ Rí Rá | Disney/Broadway, Week Two
  

Mondays @ Penn Social

Last Week’s Recap: Ariela F. (Dead Batteries Society)

This Week (May 21, Week Two):

• Special Note: For this week only, due to scheduling at Penn Social, DK won’t start until 7:30pm. 
• Theme: Disney/Broadway
• Rainbow Connection Song: TBD
  
• Who’s Up First: Pitch Set Me Up
  
• Invite your Friends: Mondays @ Penn Social | Disney/Broadway Week Two
  

Tuesdays @ Policy

Last Week’s Recap: Melanie B. (Pitch, Please)

This Week (May 21, Week Two):

• Theme: Disney/Broadway
• Rainbow Connection Song: TBD
  
• Who’s Up First: Whatever, We Can Read
  
• Invite your Friends: Tuesdays @ Policy | Disney Broadway, Week Two
  

Wednesdays @ Policy

Last Week’s Recap: Elena D. (‘NSync or Swim)

This Week (May 22, Week Two):

• Theme: Disney/Broadway
• Rainbow Connection Song: TBD
  
• Who’s Up First: Shriek, Rattle & Roll
  
• Invite your Friends: Wednesdays @ Policy | Disney/Broadway, Week Two
  

Thursdays @ The Getaway

Last Week’s Recap: Cheryl T. (Duelly Noted)

This Week (May 23, Week Two):

• Theme: Disney/Broadway
• Rainbow Connection Song: TBD
  
• Who’s Up First: Pitches from the Block
  
• Invite your Friends: Thursdays @ The Getaway | Disney/Broadway, Week Two
  

Prizes and Discounts for You, Thanks to Our Sponsors!

This week, the highest scoring soloists will win tickets to one of the following shows, courtesy of the 9:30 Club. Unless otherwise noted, all shows at the 9:30 Club.

• Monday Wins: OMD, 9:30 Club, July 13
• Tuesday Wins: John Grant, U Street Music Hall, June 29
• Wednesday Wins: The Olms, U Street Music Hall, June 12
• Thursday Win: Bosnian Rainbows, U Street Music Hall, July 12

Thanks to Zipcar DC, District Karaoke performers and fans who join Zipcar can receive 50 percent off their first year’s annual fee. To take advantage of this offer, use the promo code: districtkaraoke2013. 

After a rousing Rainbow Connection rendition of “Let’s Get It Started,” the night got started with the very first DK solo in Virginia. Game of Tones’ Maureen R. was given the honor and did not disappoint with “Goodbye Earl.” Did you know that Dennis Franz played the title character in the video for the song? That bit of trivia deserves a NYPD Boo. Up next was Derek H. representing Legion of Tune with Wheatus’ “Teenage Dirtbag.” The first person to tell me what movie the song was featured in will receive my undying respect or a beer.  Jessica F. from MICnificent did Adele proud with “Rolling In The Deep”. Round one ended with Jason H. from Mr. Holland’s O-Face singing “That’s What Makes You Beautiful.” With enough energy to match the kids from One Direction, the British boy band had better watch their backs.

Round two saw the continuation of the “Hillbilly Violence Against Men” theme by Game Of Tones. Emily J. did such a convincing job with “Before He Cheats” that this blogger will only address the team with the nicest of greetings. Up next was Gary A. from Legion of Tune rocking out on “I Believe In A Thing Called Love.” When having the shiniest shirt becomes a voting category, Gary A. wins hands down. Shana M. from MICnificent  gave the greatest karaoke version of “Total Eclipse of the Heart” that didn’t include any curse words. Round out the solos was Mr. Holland’s O-Face’s Kelly B. who took on the Queen of Soul with “Rock Steady.” If we were still talking, Aretha would say how impressed she was of the performance – that lady sure does hold a grudge.

Before we get to the all-important group round, it’s time to debut a new feature to the weekly blog. District Karaoke is rapidly expanding and it’s easy to get lost in the shuffle, especially for the newbies. Not on this blogger’s watch. Each week, get to know two DK singers in the new segment, “Get to Know Your DK Singers.” The title is still pending. This week’s victims are Kelly B. from Mr. Holland’s O-Face and Damund W. from Legion of Tune. The following answers are presented with little comment.

1. Why did you join DK?

K: Because I like to sing and hear other people sing.

D: I heard there were hot chicks and I love to sing.

2. What is your go-to karaoke sing?

K: Anything by Aretha Franklin

D: “A Real Good Man” by Tim McGraw

3. Who is your favorite member of Sugar Ray?

K: Mark McGrath

D: Is there anyone other than Mark McGrath? (And the DJ goes unnoticed once again.)

4. Backstreet Boys vs N’Sync: Who would win in a fight to the death?

K: N’Sync because of Justin Timberlake. He wins all.

D: The audience would laugh as they slap fight and it would end right there.

5. Justin Bieber, the guy from Nickelback, and Carly Rae Jepsen are all on a life raft and you can only save one. Who gets saved and why?

K: Carly Rae Jepsen because she is younger and hotter.

D: Carly Rae Jepsen because after I was done, she would definitely call me.

The group round kicked off with the ladies and gentleman of Game of Tones. Their rendition of “I Want It That Way” took the crowd back to the days of TRL, slow internet speeds, and irrational Y2K fears. Legion of Tune followed with an excellent performance of “The Lion Sleeps Tonight.” Up next was MICnificent with “Call Me Maybe.” The Ri Ra crowd enjoyed the unofficial song of Summer 2012. Mr. Holland’s O-Face ended the night with Cee-Lo Green’s “Fuck You.” While the performance was spirited, this blogger could do without all the salty language.

As the dust settled, Mr. Holland’s O-Face took the top spot with the other teams close behind. It’s still anybody’s game with seven weeks remaining until the playoffs begin. The competition gets animated this Monday as teams sing selections from Broadway or Disney. There’s nothing like ending a blog with clever wordplay.

^Jeff M. (Mr. Holland’s O-Face)

Our Mondays @ Penn Social teams were chomping at the bit to start the season off right (and outshine those jerks stealing our thunder over at Ri Ra in Arlington), and Dez the Prez obliged with his famous roll call. After a bit of trouble with the pronunciation of “bass” and all sorts of heckling (largely courtesy of yours truly), we commenced with the cage matches.

In true Monday fashion, the 90s were alive and well as Cary M. (Affidavid Bowie) brought Left-Eye back from the dead with her spot-on rendition of “Waterfalls.” Jessie K. (Dead Batteries Society) kept us back in the 90s by asking Dez to ‘Unbreak’ her ‘Heart.’ Luke W. (Back that Bass Up) had the whole room help him, help him, help him sing “You Never Even Called Me By My Name”.

Erin C. (Motley Croon) and Preethy F. (Pitch Set Me Up) showed off their incredible vocal talents with “Faithfully” and “Rumour Has It”, respectively. Not to be outdone, Jennifer J. (Track Maintenance) got the entire bar to get up and “Bust a Move.”

Round two started out with Elisabeth A. (Affidavid Bowie) wooing us with her rendition of “Lovefool,” followed by Hat S., also known as Adam S. (Dead Batteries Society), who showed off his competition-worthy air guitar skills during Pink Floyd’s “Hey You.”

Awesome altos also made an appearance (and gave me a chance to alliterate; thanks guys!). Toby N. (Back that Bass Up) and Emilie B. (Pitch Set Me Up) wowed the crowd with the Amy Winehouse classics “You Know I’m No Good” and “Valerie”, while Jessica H. (Motley Croon) crooned a very appropriately-timed “Call Me When You’re Sober” in between. (Too soon?) Emily D-F. (Track Maintenance) closed out the solo round with some Wednesday-style barnyard goat realness by transforming into a goat and swooning over a cardboard cutout of Kevin Costner with “AHHHH Will Always Love You.”

The group round got started with Affidavid Bowie showing the entire room how much they adored DK by flipping us off during their very well-harmonized rendition of “Fuck You.” My team, Dead Batteries Society, responded by describing you (yes you!) as a “Brick House”, and getting down with a Soul Train line in front of the stage.

The gentlemen of Back that Bass Up became decidedly more attractive as they wooed their ladies and a few audience members with “You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feeling.” Motley Croon decided that we hadn’t had enough, and kept us going with “I Want it That Way,” followed by Pitch Set Me Up, who showed off their vocal talents with the Eurythmics’ “Sweet Dreams.”

Closing out the night, Track Maintenance laid out a live action superhero story to the tune of “Holding Out for a Hero,” during which Clarissa B., the cheerleader, was being attacked by the Riddler (Stephanie G.), the Evil Goat (Emily D.-F.), and the Nasty Nerd (Ben H.). Luckily, the Semi-Super Swimmer (Lizzie D.), Spiderman/Peter Parker (Stephen P.), and Iron Man (CC B.) were strong, fast, and fresh from the fight, saving the day (and Clarissa B!) in the nick of time. They may not have had a butt-cape, but the performance was definitely the stuff of legends.

Had fun? Jealous that you missed out? Come drop by Penn Social on 5/20 for show-stopping Disney/Broadway tunes and the most fun you could possibly have on a Monday.

^Ariela F. (Dead Batteries Society)

Let me take this moment to deliver a mass apology (copyright Mindi W., Where My Pitches At?) for my behavior on Tuesday night. It was, unfortunately, wholly within my character and I will most likely behave in the same manner every single Tuesday night for the rest of season. Actually, please consider this a preemptive apology for the entire season.

In no particular order:

To everyone, I’m sorry that I told about a million of you that my teammate Leon S. (Pitch, Please) won the championship belt he used during his solo (“Eye of the Tiger,” during round one match-up with Call Me Medley) in a boxing match. I thought he did, because someone, I won’t say who (eh, hmm, Melba D. from Pitch Please) told me he did. But really, it was just a toy belt that he has, because of course he has a toy championship belt, why wouldn’t he? Plus, he did push-ups during the instrumental break, and boxers do push-ups, so obviously, I assumed he was a boxer. Also, I’m extra sorry to Lauren W. (Call Me Medley), because when I told her Leon S. was a champion boxer, I accidentally gleeked on her, and that’s gross. ALL FOR A LIE, MELBA D.

Ben C. (Call Me Medley), I’m not going to apologize to you. Well, maybe I am, because when I introduced myself to your wife, I called her “Ben’s Wife,” and that’s not cool, because she has a name, and the next time I see her, I’m going to use it, like a normal human. But I’m also going to thank you, because any man who puts on a mesh shirt and wraps scarves around a wireless mic to sing “Cryin’” by Aerosmith is awesome. I’ll say it again: mesh shirt. Awesome.

Jonathan W. (The Attractive Nuisances), I’m sorry I wrapped my arms around you and refused to let go when you sang “Let’s Stay Together” during round one of your match-up with Sit on my Bass, and that when I did let go, it was so I could sit on the floor and wrap my entire body around your leg. But frankly, I will probably do it again, so I’m really only half-sorry for that.

Eduardo C. (Sit on My Bass), I’m sorry I threatened to steal you away from your team during your rendition of “Say it Ain’t So,” but it’s just that it was really good, and that’s my reaction to things that are good—to steal them. So really, I guess I’m apologizing to Landon C. (Sit on My Bass), because he’s the one I threatened. But I did really enjoy meeting your parents, Eduardo C., and I hope they excuse my behavior and come back to see us again.

Landon C. (Sit on My Bass), while we’re talking about you, I’m sorry I considered cheerleading jumps (I was never a cheerleader, for good reason, i.e., my jumps) and leaping into your arms as an appropriate way to introduce myself to you. It had not occurred to me that you may not be as excited to see me as I was to see you after I saw you perform last season. Or that maybe I should shake your hand and tell you my name before leaping on you. I’m also sorry I told you that I won’t vote for your team if you don’t wear hot pants again this season, but actually, that’s true, so I’m not sorry about that part.

Marla K., props goes to your team—Whatever, We Can Read—for having the best team name, and props goes to you for doing justice to “Because the Night” during your round one match-up with Where My Pitches At? I’m not sure if I need to apologize to you. I need to apologize to someone on your team, I just don’t remember who, so please extend this to your entire team: I’m sorry for everything I did after 8 p.m. on Tuesday. Dismiss what I said. Seriously.

Evan C. (Where My Pitches At?), I’m not sorry for anything I said or did in your general direction on Tuesday, because you are like Christmas morning, and when you sang “All or Nothing,” it was like opening a shiny, sparkly gift. Thanks for being you, Evan C. Thanks for being you.

Round two match-ups, I’m sorry for what is about to happen in this blog because I’m not going to give you as much air time as round one, because this is turning out to be a super long apology (THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID).

Sara G. of Call Me Medley, I know I was dancing like what I assumed was a video vixen during your rendition of “Can’t Buy Me Love,” and I’m guessing I didn’t actually pull off my Janet Jackson routine, especially during a Beatles song, so…there’s that.

Caranda C. (Pitch, Please), my own teammate, I’m sorry that I stood on the couches and danced against the wall during your solo (“Work it Out”), because that moment was not about me, it was about you, and I made it about me, but actually, I don’t think I’m sorry, because you were top scoring soloist of the night, so it didn’t really matter that I was dancing on the couch. I mean, I should be, but I’m not. Maybe I am. I’ll think about it.

Shoshanna G. (The Attractive Nuisances)…holy smokes. I’m sorry I told you I wanted to punch you in the face after you sang “Still Hurting” but, I mean…WHAT. I cannot have such an abundance of talent just put in front of me like that when I am not emotionally prepared for it. Girl, you are incredible, and that’s how I react to people who are crazy-talented—I punch them in the face.

And PJ H. (Sit on My Bass). PJ, PJ. You sang “Rockin’  the Suburbs” with your hat on sideways. And for that, you are wonderful. I’m sorry for whatever ridiculous thing I said to you afterward. I don’t remember what it was, but I know it happened.

Katharine W. (Whatever, We Can Read), thank you one million times for singing “Mercy” during your round two match-up with Where My Pitches At? I love that song. And as soon as I remember who on your team I need to apologize to, I’m gonna do just that.

Mindi W. (Where My Pitches At?), my one true love, I am never sorry to you for anything, unless I were to accidentally run over your dog or something, then I would be sorry. Thank you for singing “Paper Planes.” I love that song, too.

As for the group round, everyone gets a slow clap for that. Everyone knows that the solo rounds are like foreplay and the group round is where the magic happens. Brav-o. Where My Pitches At?, I love you all in your white button-down shirt and shorts and Tom Cruise slides across the floor for “Old Time Rock ‘n Roll.” Call Me Medley, could I love you any more for actually swearing your way through “I Swear”?. Whatever, We Can Read, you have no idea what Guns ‘n Roses means to me (everything), and the minute I saw that top hat, I knew you were going to do me proud, and when you brought out a lion to “Welcome me to the Jungle,” you proved me right. As for you Attractive Nuisances, and your “Some Nights,” I just don’t even know what to do with you all. You sing like whoa, and you were the last team standing when open karaoke shut down at 11 p.m. We are going to be best friends, I know it.

As for my own team, Pitch, Please, and our “Simply Irresistible” nonsense, Michael R., you win the MVP award for guiding the rest of us through on-the-spot choreography. And to recap what our emcee, Classic, said to me about our performance, “You were crawling on the floor.”

If you want to know who won what, go to the standings page. Because this blog is about shenanigans only. Ain’t nobody got time for who won what.

The Spring 2013 season has begun. And we are not kidding.

I am, however, sorry for everything.

^Mel B. (Pitch Please)

Quite unexpectedly, I was first to perform!  This is now the third time that I have found out last minute that I am the first performer of the night so I suspect that someone is rigging the system.  I sang my best version of “If I Ain’t Got You” by Alicia Keys, at least the best one I could do with all my extremities shaking at once.  Then Mr. Andrew D. from A Tribe Called Northwest team got up and shook what his momma gave him in a very sensual rendition of “Valerie” (excellent song choice in my book).

Next Robert S. from E = MC Hammered went all out in a literal performance of “White N’ Nerdy.”  A+ for effort, and I mean that wholeheartedly. I have never seen more effort put into putting on every nerdy accessory known to man.  Keith D. from Blood, Sweat & Beers battled against him singing “When Doves Cry.”  This is when I forgot I was supposed to be blogging but I remember fireworks and girls throwing their underwear onstage (that happened right?).  It was exactly like a Prince concert.  Next came Bryan A. from Shriek, Rattle & Roll donning a paper plate kilt without shoes or pants while singing “American Pie.” I think he spent the first half the song sitting in a window in the back.  It was weird… and also spectacular.  Next came Betsy D. from TrebleMakers topped off the first round belting a powerful “Raise Your Glass” while balancing an entire glass of whiskey (I think) WITHOUT SPILLING – probably the most impressive thing of the night.

My amazing teammate Tommy W. kicked off the second round saying a bunch of words very very quickly (also known as rapping) while everyone stared and marveled as he spit hot fire on “Can’t Hold Us.”  Next Zachary M. from A Tribe Called Northwest put all the women in the room to shame by singing a better version of “Someone Like You” than any of us probably could (maybe even Adele).  Up next Kimberly M. from E = MC Hammered got up in a spicy hot number (with a touch of S&M) and sang a spicy hot version of “Gunpower & Lead.”  Amber M. from Blood, Sweat & Beers battled against her “Killing It Softly” (really just killing it) with her smooth pipes.  Andrea P. from Shriek, Rattle & Roll then took the night to a new level stretching and pumping and sweating and just getting “Physical” with the entire room.  Paul K. from TrebleMakers acted like he was completely intimidated by this amazing performance and then proceeded to sing a flawless version of “Walking in Memphis,” no sweat.  I felt like I really should have paid cover to come see him sing.

Finally the group round was upon us!  Tommy W., Kelly R. and I were the only ones on my team (‘NSync or Swim) who both showed up and got on stage to perform “Push It,” and I think the one lyric of the song best sums up our performance: “Boy you really got me going, so I don’t know what I’m doing.”  The audience really did have us going, and by that I mean humping them and at times I certainly thought “what am I doing…”  Next came A Tribe Called Northwest, who sang a soulful “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough,” complete with interpretive hand movements.  E = MC Hammered then did every version of the MC Hammer dance from “U Can’t Touch This” they could think of, and topped that off with one of their members dressed up as the game Operation (how literal).  Blood, Sweat & Beers sang “Love Shack” featuring a guy that sounds JUST like the guy from the B-52s, which is such a great talent that I think he should include it on his resume.  Shriek, Rattle & Roll then blew us all away by putting on a performance of “It’s Raining Men” that looked like it has been choreographed for Broadway even though they were standing on a makeshift platform loosely connected to a bench, which came apart halfway through their performance (and somehow they even made this look like it was planned).  The TrebleMakers ended the night in a big way getting the whole room going with the mother f’in “Fresh Prince of Bel-Air!” Can I say that in a blog entry?  We’ll find out!  So great to meet everyone and I can’t wait for more nights like last Wednesday this season.

Hugs and kisses and pelvic thrusts,

^Elena D. (‘NSync or Swim)

Using the new scoring/matchup system for this season, Round One started off with Duelly Noted vs. Imma Let You Finish. Newbie Jaleel S. of Duelly Noted impressed everyone with his ability to mimic The Big Bopper, perfectly matching his vocals while singing “Chantilly Lace.” Not to be outdone, Rebecca A. of Imma Let You Finish belted out a very soulful rendition of Jo Jo’s “Leave (Get Out).” The next matchup featured Jennifer K. of the No Talent Ass Clowns singing an incredible version of Heart’s “Alone” (or is it “A Loan”??). Next up was Bryant B. of the Pitch Stains, getting the crowd moving with his upbeat vocals on Toby Keith’s “I Wanna Talk About Me.” The last matchup of Round One showcased Pitches from the Block’s Jamie B. channeling Lauryn Hill for “Doo Wop” against Songponies of Death’s Cindy D., whose flip chart and “My Girl” lyrics let us all know that she and teammate Scott M. (her husband) are expecting a baby girl! Congrats to Mom and Dad!

Duelly Noted’s Adriana K. got Round Two off to a bouncy start with her lovely version of The Chiffon’s “One Fine Day.” Next up was Imma Let You Finish’s Emma P., the top-performing soloist of the night giving us all “Something to Talk About” with her sultry vocals. Patrick K. of the No Talent Ass Clowns took us back to the ‘80s with his heartfelt rendition of Billy Ocean’s “Caribbean Queen,” while Pitch Stains’ Jana M. had the entire crowd singing along to Bonnie Tyler’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart.” The final matchup of Round Two was between Pitches from the Block’s Victoria K. and Songponies of Death’s Stephanie S. I’m not sure who was more impressive: Victoria K. showing off her amazing moves and energy with Shakira’s “Objection” or Stephanie S. showing off her incredible German skills with Nena’s “99 Red Balloons.”

Duelly Noted got the crowd hopping and singing for the beginning of Round Three with Danny and the Juniors’ “At the Hop.” Imma Let You Finish kept the energy going during their version of Whitesnake’s “Here I Go Again.” The No Talent Ass Clowns offered us an old school version of Hall and Oates’ “Rich Girl,” while the Pitch Stains brought us back into this decade with One Direction’s “What Makes You Beautiful.” The final matchup of the night pitted Pitches from the Block, whose amazing costumes and very ‘80s rendition of The Buggles “Video Killed the Radio Star,” were matched only by their amazing voices, against Songponies of Death, who brought us all back to college with the Beastie Boys’ “Brass Monkey.”

Overall, a very impressive showing for Week One! Of course, we were all setting ourselves up for Week Two: Broadway/Disney Week! Looking forward to seeing what these crazy teams show us!

^Cheryl T., Duelly Noted

Announcements:

On your opening night, make sure to pick up your DK Membership Card! This card is courtesy of Peroni, the official beer sponsor of District Karaoke. It entitles you to happy hour prices on Peroni drafts and pitchers. Discounted prices are offered all week long, at any Spring 2013 venue (Penn Social, Policy, The Getaway). After nine (9) beers or five (5) pitchers, you’ll get a FREE draft!  

Mondays @ RiRa | Mondays @ Penn Social | Tuesdays @ Policy

Wednesdays @ Policy | Thursdays @ The Getaway

Mondays @ RiRa

This Week (May 13, Week One):

• Theme & Rainbow Connection Song: Anything Goes!
• Who’s Up First: Game of Tones
• Invite your Friends: Mondays @ RiRa—Anything Goes!, Week One

Mondays @ Penn Social

Upcoming Week (May 13, Week One):

• Theme & Rainbow Connection Song: Anything Goes!
• Who’s Up First: Affidavid Bowie
• Invite your Friends: Mondays @ Penn Social—Anything Goes!, Week One

Tuesdays @ Policy

This Week (May 14, Week One):

• Theme & Rainbow Connection Song: Anything Goes!
• Who’s Up First: Call Me Medley
• Invite your Friends: Tuesdays @ Policy–Anything Goes, Week One

Wednesdays @ Policy

This Week (May 15, Week One):

• Theme & Rainbow Connection Song: Anything Goes!
• Who’s Up First: ‘NSync or Swim
• Invite your Friends: Wednesdays @ Policy–Anything Goes! Week One

Thursdays @ The Getaway

This Week (May 16, Week One):

• Theme & Song Rainbow Connection Song: Anything Goes!
• Who’s Up First: Duelly Noted
• Invite your Friends: Thursdays @ The Getaway–Anything Goes!, Week One

Prizes and Discounts for You, Thanks to Our Sponsors!

This week, the highest scoring soloists will win tickets to one of the following shows, courtesy of the 9:30 Club. Unless otherwise noted, all shows at the 9:30 Club.

• Monday Wins: Eleanor Friedberger, U Street Music Hall, Thursday June 27
• Tuesday Wins: Flobots, U Street Music Hall, on Sunday, June 2
• Wednesday & Thursday Win: Cute Is What We Aim For, 9:30 Club, on Sunday June 9.

Thanks to Zipcar DC, District Karaoke performers and fans who join Zipcar can receive 50 percent off their first year’s annual fee. To take advantage of this offer, use the promo code: districtkaraoke2013. 

At District Karaoke, theme weeks are often the most exciting and highly anticipated weeks! It’s everyone’s chance to rock out to a song a song they may not have normally chosen—and an opportunity to sing outside of their metaphorical box.

So, these are the DK themes for the Spring 2013 season! 

Anything Goes! (weeks one, three and six ) – Pick any song out of the book as long as it wasn’t already sung (we’ll share a list each week).

Disney & Broadway (week two) – Do you feel pretty? Are you wishing you could be part of our world? (You can, obviously.) Pick your favorite Disney or Broadway tune and go wild with it, and all that jazz.

Never, Ever Been Sung Before (At DK) (week four) – This will be a chance to dig into the deep cuts and sing something that’s never, ever been done on a DK stage. That mean you’ll have to cross off all of those planned revivals of “Thrift Shop” and “Call Me Maybe.”

Gender Benders (week five) – One of our most tried and true themes at DK, gender bending involves boys singing songs normally sung by girls and girls singing songs normally sung by boys. It’s a night of utterly confused mayhem!

Summer Lovin’ (week seven) – You’ll be havin’ a blast when you sing these songs about summer, when the weather is fine. Feeling a bit nostalgic about a song that was popular during the summertime? Sing that, too!

’90s Mixtape (week eight) – You won’t be able to sing Motown, but you can dig out those sweet overalls for some “Motownphilly” this week. It’s practically unbelievable how much awesome will be in store! Songs from the ’90s only include the years 1990 through 1999, so anything released in the year 2000 is totally a no go, dude.

Have a question? Email singit@districtkaraoke.com.

If there were one word to sum up the night, it is undeniably: SHAMELESS! Let’s be honest, you can’t be effective in competitive karaoke if you have one ounce of self-consciousness. To the victor went the spoils, Hold On, I’m Coming held on to nothing more than mesh, banana hammocks and baby oil through all three rounds of spectacular performances.

While nearly everyone held nothing back, there were very distinct themes that ran through the evening:

Skinny Boys in Tight Clothes: Back-to-back knock out performances by Andrew B. whose Batteries Re-Choired Tenacious D-inspired, Wonderboy amazingness and Chris M.’s immaculate emulation of the artist formerly known as The Artist Formerly Known as Prince.

Bros with Fros (and Staches): Mike N. (Mötley Cröön) and Classic C. (Pitches from the Block) paid homage to the greats, hitting all the right notes with tunes by Boston and Lionel Ritchie respectively.

Americana: Coming off of one of the biggest news weeks this country has seen in a while, Sue D. (REO Lush Wagon) reminded everyone about American pride as all of Penn Social joined her in “God Bless the USA.” Adam S. aka Hat (Batteries Re-Choired) sang his “Renegade” heart out for outlaws everywhere. It doesn’t get much more American than the classic Tenacious D. ditty, “Fuck Her Gently” performed in full dominatrix (whip and all) by Debra B. (Pitches from the Block).

VH1 Divas: Giselle A. gave us cut off jorts and Mariah Carey-Cannon (or is it Cannon-Carey, we all know who wears the pants). DJ S. (99 Problems But Pitch Ain’t One) gave us Tina Turner legs, wigs and fire with “Proud Mary.” Songponies brought the divas out for both solo rounds. There was nothing virginal about Cindy D.’s Madonna (“Like A Virgin”) and Maryjo O. would’ve made Adele proud with “Someone Like You.” I think we found a long lost Wilson sister in Erin C., (Mötley Cröön). I’m willing to bet she didn’t go home Alone. One of my personal favorites was Heather M. who proved REO Lush Wagon isn’t just an awesome team name, it’s a way of life—this diva chugged an entire glass of red wine before putting Celine Dion to Canadian shame during every high night of “All By Myself.”

Personality Disorders: Matt W. (Call Me Medley) is known for his mash-ups and did not disappoint when he mixed Kanye’s “Stronger “with Kelly Clarkson’s hit, “Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You)” and sang as and/or to Kris H., Kris J., Kim K., Ray J. and Kanye AT. THE. SAME. TIME. Faith H.’s performance was 50 shades of cray. . . she had 99 Problems and a Britney was One, Two, Three and Four! Unless you too are willing to put your junk in a bright yellow banana hammock, DMills (Hold On, I’m Coming) “Sweet Transvestite” makes him the official owner of the phrase “Schwing It.”

If the group performances were a bedtime story, they’d go something like this: Call Me Medley laid the Yellow Brick Road to the Sugar High where Mötley Cröön poured so much sugar on 99 Problems that it started “Raining Men” from REO Lush Wagon’s “Intergalatic” atmosphere, their robots’ Batteries Re-Choired “The Right Stuff” in order to Hold On, I’m Coming back from the “Time Warp” where Pitches from the Block had “The Time of My Life” after feasting on “Rock Lobster” before they all rode out on their Songponies.

Editor’s Note: The final results are:

• 1st place: Hold On, I’m Coming (Tuesdays @ Policy)
• 2nd place: Batteries Re-Choired (Mondays @ Penn Social)
• 3rd place: Call Me Medley (Tuesdays @ Policy)
• 4th place: Pitches from the Block (Thursdays @ The Getaway)
• 5th place: 99 Problems But Pitch Ain’t One (Wednesdays @ Policy)
• 6th place: REO Lush Wagon (Wednesdays @ Policy)
• 7th place: Mötley Cröön (Mondays @ Penn Social)
• 8th place: Songponies (Thursdays @ The Getaway)

^Shana M. (Take Note, Tuesdays @ Policy)

Before the night even began, the anticipation was palpable. Ben T., who had come to support his friends on REO Lush Wagon, was expecting “some of the best entertainment in all of northwest D.C. on April 22.” Rightfully so! After 10 weeks of stiff competition, the bar had been set high. None of us could imagine being anywhere else. As Alex P. noted, “where else are you going to see Susan Boyle and Lady Gaga in the same room?” She was referring, of course, to the Fall 2012 City-Wide Finals, where all sorts of characters came out to sing. That torch was carried in all of its glory this Monday, as well.

 While Will R. was excited to see “Pitches from the Block kicking ass and taking names,” Maria W. was looking forward to high levels of talent and the opportunity to judge people. At DK, this is no small feat given the liveliness and capabilities of all who had made it this far. Of the 24 teams that started the season, only eight teams were left to compete to be—what I can personally say ought to be considered DC’s highest honor—DK champions. Of course, it is always good to have professional assistance in the form of DK’s CWF judging panel.

Judge K Street Kate of K Street Magazine reminded everyone that the night was not only about talent, but also about entertainment. She was there to see both and both did she see! When asked what an essential aspect of the evening was, she responded, “World peace, but harmony is more important!” (Pun very much intended and appreciated.)

Even a rando on the street can tell that DK is a tight-knit community. In attendance this particular evening was scores of friends, family members, colleagues and competitors. I asked Keith and Jeanene, parents of a Call Me Medley superstar (was it Matt W.?) , if they had any pointers for their beloved karaoke-er. Dad and Mom responded, “Go all out!” and “Don’t fall down!” Both excellent tips and sentiments we could all share! 

In addition to the usual crowd, 15 Reform rabbis were in attendance to see DK Commissioner Jesse B lead the festivities. Sounds like more than a minyan of rabbis also appreciated the hard work of our fearless leader!

Changing the pace a bit, I asked folks, “If you could see any two people in the history of time have a karaoke battle royale, who would they be?” Onlooker Sarah Beth said, “My dad. He’s a great singer!” Her significant other John gave the appropriate BF response: “There’s no contender!” Or perhaps DK should host a Karaoke Battle of the Generations! Eileen M. and Boson A. (Where My Pitches At?) had a more literal battle in mind. Boson called upon the prowess of Joan of Arc, “with a real sword.” Eileen suggested Napoleon Bonaparte, claiming that nobody would expect his pipes of steel. Sometimes big things certainly do come in small packages, especially when karaoke is involved!

With performances complete and vote-tallying in progress, I sought the opinions of the awestruck masses. Mary Helen informed me that her favorite part of the evening was the coordination, execution and originality of Songponies’ performance of “Rock Lobster.” Stephanie R. was impressed by Batteries Re-Choired’s rendition of NKOTB’s “The Right Stuff,” thanks to some awesome vests and sweet dance moves. “I hated that song back then, but I love it now!” Mindi W. (Where My Pitches At?) was excited to be part of the show. “There’s nothing that could make my life more complete than being pulled on stage by a sexy baby” (Referring to Tommy B. of 99 Problems But Pitch Ain’t One, taking her on stage achair during “It’s Raining Men.”) Asked about his favorite part of the evening, judge Jeremy M. (owner of DK’s Thursday venue, The Getaway) replied, “I don’t know; I’m wasted!” He was clearly having a great time. To those teams doting upon the judges: Mission Accomplished!

I asked judge Steve S., bassist for The HariKaraoke Band, “if you could compare the night’s performances to a musical instrument, what would it be and why?” He said the evening reminded him of a 13-year-old playing lead guitar in their bedroom. “Rockin,’ but not sure who would listen.” I know we’ve all been there (whether in the bedroom, the car, the shower, etc.). At the #dkcitywides, there was definitely some rockin,’ powered by teenage-levels of energy and enthusiasm that screamed “we are invincible!” And everyone was listening!

At the end of the evening, I inquired of District councilman and honorary DK judge Tommy Wells what song he would use to describe his political aspirations for D.C. to make it a better place. After much consideration, he chose Cat Steven’s “Peace Train.” It’s great to see someone with such a positive attitude, channel that enthusiasm into his (currently exploratory) campaign for Mayor. Tommy, DK appreciates your support, and you have ours!

For a recap of the main event, see Shana M.’s (Take Note) blog.

So ends another incredible season of District Karaoke. Until next time, DK! 

^Kevin J. (Track Maintenance, Wednesdays @ Policy)